Bad Resume

Human resources managers, if you’re looking for my actual resume, try the About Me page.

BAD RESUME
inspired by Steve Yegge
http://steve-yegge.blogspot.com/2007/09/ten-tips-for-slightly-less-awful-resume.html

Objective: I am seeking a position as a self-employed executive.

Education:

  • 12 years of Sunday School
  • Applied to Bryn Mawr College
  • Accepted into University of Pennsylvania’s post-doc program; chose not to attend

Experience

  • Custom Latin motto designer – “semper ubi sub ubi” solum principium erat …
  • Formed a political party for women with the first name Sara (also Sarah)http://sarahsara.wordpress.com/
  • Produced and sold hand-crafted crocheted hats, gloves, etc.

Job Titles

Skills

  • Calligraphy
  • Domestic Animal Calling (specializing in cats, chickens, and pigs)
  • Free Form Poetry Composition

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